No Returns

Yesterday my son said out loud the words I have been dreading. I know he had been forming the sentence in his mind for a few weeks now. "I wish I was Michael because he doesn't have sisters or brothers and he never has to wait for his mom". Whoosh-the sound of any confidence as a parent I had left in me at 5pm on a weekday leaving me. Truly, I am glad he was able to find the right words and express himself-we knew the honeymoon would end one day and had been expecting this for awhile now. Jealousy. Check please waiter, and would you take these siblings with you when you clear the table. Thanks much.

The three of them. I can't call them "children" because the oldest is in college. And in between repeating rounds of the classic "he's bothering me/she yelled at me/I don't want her in my room" game, the three of them are the very best of friends. My son is doted on by his big sister and her gaggle of girlfriends, pampered with endless trips to the playground and bedtime story after bedtime story. When one falls, the others come to give a hand up-even the one who pushed him down. Put one in time out and the other will inevitably stop what they are doing and drift over to entertain, amuse and commiserate with their sibling, pleading the case for release. During baseball this evening my son put down his bat, left the mound and walked over to the fence shouting to me "Mom, watch her, she might fall" . His little sister stopped climbing the sand mound near the field to smile up adoringly at him, her dirty face glowing with adoration. (Thankfully it was a practice not a game-and for the record I was not only watching but standing right next to her).

An hour after he was born, my new son's adolescent sister held him for the first time. Led first into the room , she sat in a hospital chair holding his tiny little fist, counting his toes and staking her claim on her little brother. Fast forward four and a half years. Two hours after she was born, our very new, tiniest baby was surrounded by her older brother and sister. My mother in law questioned me, do you want him to hold the baby now? With a sibling on either side and their arms wrapped around her forming sort of a safety net,the baby met her older brother and sister. There they sat huddled together, examining her and making room in their secret society for another.

So I just listened to my son rant for a few minutes over the injustice of having to wait for me to pour him juice while I changed a diaper. He let known how unfair his life was, with two sisters always petting his kitten and playing with his Legos. The selfishness of them and of waking up to find the last pancake gone because he was not the only kid in the house. They make him so mad and what messes they make! Then, when he was finished, he stood from the table and took his little sisters hand. Pulling her along they went to go play in the tent they had made in the middle of the dining room. While he held the tent flap open and she scrambled in, he asked for a story, two juice boxes please and some cookies for a snack.